Extreme heat in the helm and thus everything outdoorsy looked mundane and unexciting for the past 2-3 days. Sitting at home this whole weekend, i felt lethargic and bored. Before i noticed, my focus ,shifted inward- but one which meandered the full loop of my random day.
I started on the periphery, donning the shoes of the usual homemaker -cooked a meal, cleaned the closets, polished some furniture, vacuumed and re-arranged the rooms (pet peeves: unorganized, dirty space!!) Obvious next, it proceeded to a good soak for myself. Still more time on hand, i indulged at a near by salon. Back home, a light snack and I was immersed into the couch with the day's headlines and a business magazine. A slave to still more time, the question was on the horizon and it soon shone-- Where am i headed , what are my goals?? Grave question and one which settled steadily on me ,like the early twilight seducing the sun to rise. I tried to think , but could'nt concentrate. I pondered deep but my answers felt enveloped, as if in double shrines. I felt an impermeable wall within , for i cud'nt gain any sincere evocation. My mind drew an analogy, the purpose the goal that i strived for- was like the familiar but unlit foyer of an outhouse, deep in the yard, beside a bright cheerful home at night.